Haunting questions such as “What is love?”, “Will I ever be loved?” and “Does true love exist?” echo through the lyrics of many well-know songs, fill vast numbers of poems, form the basis for classic epic films and, most of all, resonate in the heart of every member of the human race. Perhaps the fact that this question is being pursued so intensely speaks of that fact that most of mankind is searching but isn’t finding a satisfying answer.
The truth is that ALL of us have been born with a deep need to be loved unconditionally for who we are, with no strings attached. The reality is that this love-hunger is a God-given need, not just a human desire, and definitely NOT a weakness! Life becomes unbearable without being loved, and without being in loving relationship. This is how we were made by our Creator God.
Though we all have this deep need, we can tend to minimise or suppress the longing inside. Why? Are we afraid we’ll never be loved as we truly want to be loved? Or do feel embarrassed or ashamed that we do have a deep need, even though perhaps, on many other levels, we have a comparatively good life?
Based on my understanding of the Word of God, I can confidently assure you that God wants to meet your need for love, as He’s done, and is doing, in many other of His children. He created you to be loved. He knows about your need, and He wants to meet it.
One thing which is critical is that we own, and don’t deny, the existence of this need. It may be very deep, somewhat hidden or almost quenched. But it’s certainly there, because God created you for the purpose of deep, loving, satisfying relationship. You may need to own and embrace the fact that you’re still in need of love, and owning this reality may hurt.
You may also need to ask God if there are any sources of false comfort in your life that keep you from truly reaching out to love. False comforts may seem comforting, but don’t forget, they’re false - they never really satisfy your heart. In fact they disappoint, and make you feel all the more unloved, or perhaps even unlovable, in the end.
Cry out to God from the depths of your heart that you may know His satisfying love. Ask Him to help you connect to the need inside and not to deny it. Ask Him to show you the false comforts which you’ve embraced in efforts to numb the aching pain. God wants you to know His love.
"Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me."
Psalm 42:7, NIV
Peter Brokaar and his American wife, Liz, left the Netherlands in 2005 to join the team at Ellel Scotland. He is now Assistant Director and House Manager and finds much pleasure in teaching. He has three children, Emma, Samuel and Benjamin, all born on Scottish soil. When there is any free time he enjoys reading, cooking, surfing and hiking.
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